Eeek! I’ve become the Charlie Brown Teacher!!
More and more I’ve noticed lately that annoying tendency that kids often have with their mothers…you make requests until you are blue in the face, and you notice that your children not even registering a word that comes out of your mouth. Wha wha wha wha wha wha wha–just like the teacher on the old Charlie Brown cartoons. Much to my husband’s chagrin, I find myself compensating by raising the volume of my voice, which as I’ve stated before, I don’t really consider yelling, but more just trying to get their attention so that I don’t have to repeat myself 40 more times before they will actually comply with my request.
More often than not, I am finding myself physically directing my little angels to stop what they are doing and gently nudge them towards whatever activity needs doing. Some of those basic things that should just get done automatically. Get dressed. Brush your teeth. Come to the table because dinner is ready. At what point does a 9 and 11 year old realize that if you just listen to the mom, life will be so much quieter and everyone will be so much happier.
Perhaps I should patent some sort of recording device just to replay all of my most used phrases: Keep your hands to yourself. Brush your teeth. Leave your brother alone. Go up to bed. Blow your nose. (Before departing on a trip) Did you go to the bathroom? Please clear your dishes from the table. Maybe I could drum up some sort of hologram that looks like me and plays all the phrases for me at the appropriate times, then I wouldn’t have to!
I have to assume at some point in life all that nagging actually pays off. I do actually see glimmers of hope when they actually do complete some of the tasks that they should be doing without being told. And I have actually smartened up along the way and cleared some of the roadblocks that used to get in the way of having a relatively stress free morning of getting ready for school. I used to not make my kids get dressed until they were awake for a bit and had their breakfast. Just by requiring them to get dressed before coming downstairs, that alleviated much nagging and pestering on most mornings, and got us out the door with more efficiency and smoothness.
We are still working on some of the basics that still get in the way: Please put your shoes in the mudroom, and you will always know where they are when you need them. Please hang up your backpack. Please put your dirty clothes in the laundry. It is often so hard not to do these things yourself just because it seems quicker and easier than asking them to do it. But I know that really is not teaching them much, except that their mom is also their personal maid servant and that mom will eventually do whatever they haven’t done if they ignore it long enough.
I have very much enjoyed the laxer versions of our summer days, and I’m sure the kids have too. We don’t HAVE to get out and get anywhere first thing. We CAN lounge around for a bit in our jammies before sprinting off somewhere most mornings. I don’t really hear the wha wha wha voice coming out of my voice so much. But it still peeks out every now and then, even in summer.
I wonder if the new school year will bring a smoother version of the morning routine as we get back into the grind. I notice with every year more and more maturity with my little men, and marvel at the distance we’ve traveled from their toddler youth. I’m hoping the volume gets lower and lower on my voice as we continue our path together, although I hear from some of my friends with older kiddos that may be wishful thinking with the teenage years right around the corner. Let’s hope we’re heading in the right direction…
I tell mine the same things – hang up your backpack, brush your teeth, with my long haired children I also have to add in the brush your hair!! I feel your pain but hopefully they will will figure it our before it kills us!