Anatomy of Sisters
I was fortunate enough to have spent the weekend with both of my sisters to celebrate my eldest sister’s 50th birthday. It’s not often that we all gather together as we are spread geographically, involved with the every day routines of our own immediate families and caught up in working and all the things that are a part of our daily lives.
One of my sisters and I were marveling at how the three of us could be so alike and yet so different in so many ways. Being the youngest of the family, I was often labeled the pest, and rightly so, as I often like to kid and poke and make fun of all of the members of the family. My middle sister could probably be labeled the glue. She is very no nonsense, direct and often mediates between all of us to make sure we are all on the same wavelength. My eldest sister has a gregarious personality, often bringing me to tears of laughter retelling a story from one adventure or another.
I’m told I am a control freak, but I don’t think I am. I consider myself more of a laid back kind of person with obsessive tendencies when the shit hits the fan. I’ve always been one to procrastinate, and find myself going into overdrive when something really needs to be done. My middle sister likes to get everything done as soon as she knows it needs doing so that her mind is at rest, and she can revel in a job well done once the task is complete. My eldest sister is on a different spectrum as well. She is more often than not the fly on the seat of her pants kind of woman who switches gears on a moment’s notice and can be doing something completely different and unexpected in the blink of an eye.
Having spent the weekend together, it’s just neat to see the dynamics between us and witness the natural ebb and flow that just happens when we are all together. Then throw in the mom, and it’s a combination that can’t be beat. We all know each other so well, we can anticipate what the other is going to be doing, and compensate for what the other is lacking. What one sister may leave unfinished, one of the other two will come in after to complete. This runs the gamut between cooking, laundry or wiping a child’s nose, or soothing a boo boo on one of the kids. I so appreciate our rhythm of being together. It’s just easy. It’s not to say that we do not have our disagreements and scuffles, as we do, but I think we know each other well enough to be able to skirt any major differences of opinion to prevent an all out war.
I am also amazed that three sisters raised in the same manner, by the same parents could have turned out so differently. It serves as a reminder to myself with my own kids that every drummer does indeed beat to the tune of their own drum. It helps to know that we all don’t think alike, and that can still be ok. At the same time, even though we are vastly different, we can be very much the same as well. My husband has said he thought it really amusing when I do butt heads with my sisters, because he sees that we are so much alike. I’m not sure that I would have agreed, but his feeling must have been coming from somewhere. I have to imagine that the experiences that we’ve shared together as family members in our youth will forever link us and have laid the foundation for who we are as adults today.
So yet again, today I am thankful for the wonderful experience of being a sister. There is nothing quite like spending time with someone that knows you so well, that you don’t ever really have to fully explain yourself. Nice that someone can more than likely anticipate what you are doing before you even do it, and in a good way. So as much as you might occasionally disagree, or even want to choke for that matter, your sister, lighten up. Nothing will ever be able to replace the knowledge and experience that you both share, and they will always be a part of who you are. Love you sisters. Thank you for just being you.