More Curious Things I’ve Learned…

 

  • It is possible for a bee to buzz up your leg and sting you while you are mowing the lawn.  Consequently, you may also have difficulty figuring out how to get the damn thing out of your pant leg.
  • Should you happen to be sitting on a pier next to a river and knock your friend’s cork bottomed sandal into said river, it will indeed float.  Hence, this will allow a passing motor boat to retrieve the floating sandal.
  • A really excited kid can jump up and down hard enough to chip a tooth while on a roller coaster, or even before the ride even starts.  Twice.  Same tooth.  Same adult front tooth. Really.
  • If your kid says that they are full, and you encourage them to have one last bite, it is possible that they hurl their entire dinner back at you. Also related, if your child complains that they have a belly ache, but otherwise seem fine with no fever, they may indeed throw up immediately after you return home from dropping them off at school and need to go back and retrieve them.
  • Brown ants do indeed bite, and cause some really cool welts too! I found this for myself when I inadvertently sat on an ant hill while weeding a patch of my garden.   Note to self, railroad ties are good homes for insects.
  • There is indeed a day’s difference when traveling overseas.  I found this when I arrived a day later than the friends we were meeting.
  • If you are late for an appointment, it follows that every traffic light turns red just as you approach it.
  • Over time, silk seams in shorts weaken.  My father in law brought this to my attention as we returned home from church together, wearing such a pair of shorts with weakened seams.  Not sure who in the congregation saw this fact as well, but thankfully pantyhose cover a decent amount of skin.
  • If you’ve used every spare outfit in your diaper bag on your child, it is certain that they will indeed have a blowout requiring more clothing. Be assured that a blanket makes a fine stand in for temporary clothing.
  • Leaving a thermos slightly open does indeed allow a water bug to climb inside of it.  Consequently, even after pouring boiling hot water, followed by hot coffee, the stubborn little bugger may still be wiggling inside said thermos.  It is also likely that you will pour this pesky little fellow not in your own cup, but into your guest’s cup as well.
  • Do not leave a filet mignon roast unattended over direct heat on the grill, as it may catch on fire.  Especially when you are serving said roast to guests.
  • Also related to the above curiosity, when you are having guests for dinner and preparing food on the grill, it is more than likely that you will indeed run out of gas while you are cooking. This can and does happen repeatedly.
  • Your inspection sticker does not always coincide with your car’s registration. In conjunction with this interesting fact, oddly enough, police officers do indeed pull you over in parking lots when they notice your expired registration.
  • Garages aren’t necessarily tall enough to raise and lower the lid on your ragtop.  Fortunately for me, Tom learned this fact directly, and not myself. This also may generate a lot of really colorful language while this is happening.
  • Believe it or not, it is possible to burn spaghetti, especially when cooking rice pasta, which apparently absorbs lots of the water while you are cooking it…
  • Toast can indeed catch on fire in the toaster oven.  This also applies to cheesecake, especially if you don’t reduce the temperature when you place it in the oven as the recipe directs.
  • Sump pumps are likely to fail while you are away on vacation.  Especially if there is torrential rain while you are away.
  • When you are backing into a pole that is lower than the view of your rear view mirror, it is indeed strong enough to dent your bumper.
  • If you have two key fobs on the same key chain, this can interfere with starting the car.  This simple little fact can also be learned after you call for service…
  • If you don’t properly slant a tarp over your tent, it can indeed rain hard enough to collapse your tent from the water that collects in it.  Especially at 3 am.

Hope you’ve enjoyed some of these wonderful lessons I’ve learned…I’d love to hear some of  your favorites…

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